Direction?!

I feel like I can take my magic career in many directions and I am having trouble deciding what to do next. I recently had some emotional problems which made things even worse but I got that under control. I thought my life was in the gutter when I was a drug addict then I meet the 12 step women and think "dang I'm in karmic hell or something"! Art is my destiny I just need to find my way.

One way to go is a festival next week. I was planning on being a one trick Sally and performing Triple Chefalo Knot at the festival without asking for tips just for stage time. I was told by two magicians I respect not to do this. I blew it this year and wrote a screenplay that never happened in Winter then quickly threw together an act for Summer and bombed when I tried it. I only got like 5 days to practice for the weekend so I just don't know.

Another option is youtube. My account has finally started generating money, a very small amount but something. I am thinking I could perform a better quality "The Killer Who Scared Me" with a lady and see if I can get any views that way. Also maybe do a punk rock music video in character with some magic and a lady in her underwear. I was going to do some political mud slinging video but I am too sensitive for politics anymore so I think this would be a bad idea.

Also my bookstore. I could get a book test and perform for custies. Mostly tourists for the rest of the Summer.

Also I could be a art agent and try and get my artist friend shows in Portland and Boise for a cut of the profits.

Or I could meditate my butt off and figure out a traveling busking set to get out of the terrible East Oregon Winter. I try and visualize how to stay clean and eat and gas and character and material I could be proud of and make it BIG!!!! I'm a talented guy and I've lead a strange life and I feel if I could bring all the experiences and skills I've accumulated over the years into one act I could make something out of myself. I fantasize about Wintering in SD where I could shower at the beach and reconnect with old friends like my bro Magic Matt.

I wish I could do all of this and more but find with magic I can't go in many different directions. I can learn a set show if I practice often but when I put a trick down for a month I got to start all over.